Oct 14, 2011

The Coffee Shop Revisited


Writer #2: Hey everybody. Been waiting long?

Writer #1: No, we just sat down. Writer #2, let me introduce you to Writer #4, she’s new to the neighborhood. She writes YA.

Writer #2: So glad to meet you.

Writer #4: *hiccup* Sorry, I think my iced coffee gave me the hiccups. Happy to meet you as well.

Writer #2: Isn’t it fun watching our little group grow?

Writer #3: Some of us more than others.

Writer #2: What has you in such a foul mood? Why the sad face?

*hiccup*

Writer #3: I’m just wondering why she gets to be writer #1. Where is it written that she gets to be #1 and I have to be stuck being writer #3?

Writer #1: *sigh* I’ve been trying to explain to her that it isn’t a ranking system, just a method in which individuality can be maintained.

Writer #3: You can say that until your blue in the face, but I know the truth.

Writer #1: I don’t have an agent, and you do. I haven’t been published, and you have. I’ve not won any awards for my short-fiction, and you have. Why in the world would you think that makes me #1?

Writer #3: You do realize that you’re making my point for me?

Writer #2: Personally, I like the number 3. If you put a less-than symbol in front of it, you get a sideways heart.

Writer #3: What are you talking about?

Writer #4: I know I’m new…*hiccup*…but does it really matter?

Writer #2: It actually does. Continuity is a very important story element.

Writer #1: Will it make you feel better if instead of writer 1...2...3…4, we instead use A, B,C,D?

Writer #3: Can I be writer A?

Writer #1: No, we should stay in the same sequence as before.

Writer #3: So I’d be a C? Average??

Writer #1: Good gosh.

Writer #4: What about using colors? I’m wearing a blue top, so I can be writer blue. *hiccup*

Writer #1: And I’m wearing a gold sweater, so I’d be writer gold?

Writer #3: I can go along with that. No implied sense of stature! So I’m now writer red.

Writer #2: But what if we’re not wearing any clothes?

*Silence*

*Hiccup*

Writer Gold: But you are wearing clothes, quite nice ones I might add, so now you’re writer black.

Writer Red: For some reason that seems so perfect!

Writer Blue: So, what does everyone else write?

Writer Gold: I write steamy romances.

Writer Red: Fantasy.

Writer Black: I tinker around with mystery/suspense.

Writer Blue: You’re joking?

Writer Black: No, why?

Writer Red: So how did writer blue and you meet?

Writer Gold: It’s the funniest thing. She commented on one of my comments I left on DL’s blog and we started emailing one another back and forth. One thing led to another…

Writer Red: Wait a minute! DL’s blogging again? I thought he pulled the plug.

Writer Gold: I thought so too, but a couple weeks ago he popped up on my reader and sure enough, he’s back. Isn’t it wonderful?

Writer Red: How long do you think he’s going to stick around this time?

Writer Blue: I only recently found him. How long has he been blogging?

Writer Black: Since 2009. He writes mysteries too.

*Hiccup*

Waitress: Ma’am, that gentleman in the corner with the Mac book sent this coffee over for you.

Writer Black: That is sooo sweet!

Writer Gold: You’ve got to be kidding me? She’s being hit on in a coffee shop?

Writer Red: I’m not surprised. If she pops open one more button on that blouse I’d hit on her myself.

Writer Blue: I think I recognize him from somewhere?

Writer Gold: Whatever you do, no one smile at him!

Writer Black: But he bought me a coffee.

Writer Gold: For goodness sake, he’s dressed in a dark colored raincoat with a hoodie underneath and there’s not a cloud in those 80 degree skies.

Writer Red: And he’s using a Mac Book.

Writer Blue: Oh my god! He’s getting up and looking this way.

Writer Gold: Shit!

Writer Blue: I think my hiccups are gone.

21 comments:

  1. Awesome, D! This part was my favorite: "Writer #2: Personally, I like the number 3. If you put a less-than symbol in front of it, you get a sideways heart."

    Hahaha! And I don't know about the color thing...gold usually implies #1. First place always gets the gold! But I wouldn't bring that the attention of Writer #3 if I were you... ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. These are so fun! I forgot I was reading a blog post~ you should really stop writing suspense/mysteries and get into women's fiction, DL~ I was hooked :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Now that's a group of women for you! (And I can say that because I am one.)

    ReplyDelete
  4. So glad to hear DL is back! *buys him virtual coffee*

    ReplyDelete
  5. *giggles.
    I def like the colors. Stick with that. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  6. This was totally entertaining!

    I also loved the <3 reference. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. I so enjoyed that. I'm so glad I came over from Lydia's blog. I hope you have a great weekend.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I love the <3 reference, too. This was great.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I had a Seinfield flashback while reading this. I loved the conversations Jerry and the gang had in the diner and this definitely had that flavor. Great dialogue. :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. "But what if we're not wearing any clothes?

    *Silence*"

    Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Lol! I love the fight about their designations. :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. LOL! This was so much fun! I loved the part where if she loses one more button... and then he turns out to be a stalker! With a Macbook~ :D <3

    ReplyDelete
  13. My husband's giving me weird looks 'cause I haven't stop laughing since I started reading this post. :D

    ReplyDelete